You will notice a marked change to the tone of this post! I’m a mood swinging clomifiend but right now the swing is up so who cares!
I talked to the nurse at my OBGYN because she wanted some more details than what I left on the voice mail. She then went over and talked to my doctor (she said he was at the hospital, so I hope I didn’t interrupt anyone’s delivery!) and he said that my ovary looked so good that he wasn’t worried about a cyst at all and that he would give it until Friday before we counted me out this cycle! FRIDAY OMG! That’s five more days of hope! I called the husband and he was really happy too! We are as happy as two happy things on a happy train!
The teensy weensy itty bitty downer to this is that the nurse said if I don’t ovulate and I don’t bleed I should wait until November to call for some Provera. November.
It’s September y’all. November is a long time to wait to try again, but at the same time it would give us October off to just sort of relax (if that’s possible), and maybe that wouldn’t be so bad. Maybe. Maybe we’d end up with one of those surprise babies from some freakish ovulation event.
Accidental pregnancy-that’s funny.
ANYWHO, now that I’m feeling emotionally recharged I thought I’d give you all the low down and dirty on the in-laws. Grab a high fiber snack, this will take a while.
I can’t tell you all the horrible things they’ve ever done, but when the novel documenting our story is published I’ll let you know. It should be roughly the size of War and Peace. Anyway, I can give you an overview leading up to what happened this week.
Husband and I started dating in March of 2010. Something you should know about us is that I have been in love with him since I was 14 and he was 20. I was dating his brother who was 17 when I was 14 when I first met my husband, and the first words he said to me when we met were “you’re way too good for my brother to be dating”. Who WOULDN’T fall in love with that? Then when he went to Iraq I sent him letters and he sent me some back. All just as friends, because at this point he hardly knew I existed (which is good, because a 20 year old and a 14 year old would be creepy, even 14 year old me knew that).
Eventually I moved on and dated some other boys. One I dated for about 4 years and almost married. After we broke up my life was pretty much a big old break-up mess. I had never slept with anyone else other than this man and at the ripe old age of 21 I started to sow all those practically-a-virgin wild oats. I slept around a little too much, luckily with no lasting medical effects. One of the people I unfortunately slept with is husband’s brother, i.e. my now brother-in-law. We had a FWB relationship for several months and then I started dating a really sweet man who unfortunately was an alcoholic. After that relationship ended husband was finally ready to ask me out.
Throughout all the other relationships, husband was always in the back of my mind as this unattainable dream. When we started to date I felt like I had everything. I had this amazing man who could accept me and my history and my four cats and a dog AND that I’d slept with his brother. He never batted an eye at any of it.
During our courtship (fun old timey words!) his parents got a job transfer to another state but didn’t want to sell their home in case the transfer didn’t work out, so we agreed to “rent” it from them with his brother (once his brother’s girlfriend found out I’d be living there too she quickly jumped on the bandwagon to rent as well) which was only moderately awkward considering how many times his brother had seen me naked. Then (thank bajeesus) his brother also got a job transfer and moved away with the girlfriend, leaving us in the house alone.
A lot of the time alone with husband’s dad.
See, husband’s dad is a raging alcoholic, so when his wife got a job transfer he just let his contract at his work run out so he could start drawing unemployment and drink all day. This is what he does while she works, all day every day. He also smokes like a fracking chimney. So he frequently had to come back to check in with the unemployment office. So despite the fact that we were paying rent and all the utilities, he would FREQUENTLY come to the house without notice and stay as long as he wanted. I’m pretty sure most landlords don’t do that.
Then, husband and I decided that we wanted to buy the house. It needs a lot of work, but his folks only owed about $36,000 on it and offered to sell it to us for $48,000. It appraised for $90,000, so this was a deal we wanted to jump on. I really thought that after we bought the house there would be a little more consideration shown towards us.
I am the dumb.
Last Christmas they stayed with us for TEN DAYS and in that ten days, his dad bitched and moaned about how uncomfortable my full sized guest bed was. So on Christmas Eve, husband and I came home to find that his dad had ordered a new queen sized bed without asking me and shoved all of my belongings in my other spare bedroom around to put it in there. He didn’t order a frame-just a box spring and a mattress that were sitting on the floor. In the bedroom right next to ours. The last bedroom I want them to sleep in. He said “I don’t know why you’re so upset-I just bought you a huge gift!” Please bloggy friends, please tell me you understood why I was upset. This was also the first Christmas I had to deal with my parents being divorced AND my first Christmas to be married to my husband. It was pretty horrible.
After Christmas we put the bed away. Every time he comes he wants us to put it out and we refuse. Then this weekend they come down and when we get home from dinner on Friday night, they’re moving all my crap around to set up the GODDAMN bed. So I went back there and told them to stop and that they needed to sleep in the bed I had in the guest room. They started to yell at me and husband got upset with them and walked out of the house, so I yelled at them that despite what they believed this was OUR house now and they DON’T get to make any decisions about it anymore, and if they didn’t LIKE the bed we had set up (that is an antique that has been passed through my family BTW) then they could stay in a hotel and stop treating his son like crap on his 30th birthday. I then ran out to find husband.
They stayed in a hotel.
I know you’re thinking that husband has no spine, and he should learn to be braver with his parents-but they are a force to be reckoned with. And he’s dealing with the fact that his dad will be dead in the next five years. When they were leaving though they talked to him some and he really stuck up for me and said that I was the best thing that ever happened to him and that they couldn’t continue to treat us with this lack of respect. Supposedly they apologized to him and said that everything was fine and it was water under the bridge.
Fast forward to dinner on Saturday night. They insisted that they wanted me to go despite the fight. They assured husband that everything was fine. Then they sat at dinner and attacked me for going to college (no one in their family has) and how I don’t make as much money as husband despite that fact. They also got on my case about when the grandchildren would be coming, because his dad doesn’t have “as much time to wait” as we do. Here’s the thing about this-it’s annoying enough to have people who DON’T know about your infertility problems to ask you about having kids, but when the people who DO know ask, it’s just cruel and insensitive. And his parents do know because on one of his dad’s many visits (seriously y’all, we’ve been married for a year in October and he has been to stay with us over 20 times, for multiple days each time usually) I had to go to the OBGYN and he got all nosy about where we were going and why Jason had to drive me there. There were also some subtle digs about having to stay in a hotel and how they “sure wish they had know before they came” that that would be the case.
Then his mother let me know on Sunday that she had had to clean my floors and bathrooms and kitchen counter tops, because they just weren’t “sanitary” enough for anyone to live with.
They left this morning at 7:00 am and had to come by the house to pick up their dog and some things they had been storing in our extra freezer. I made a point of NOT being up to see them off. Husband also knows that when they call to tell us (not ask us mind you) that they’re coming to stay again that he is to say no, for everyone’s well being, they need to stay in a hotel.
That is the sad truth about my family. And you thought me sleeping with my brother-in-law was bad.
Now that you’re all in pieces on the floor after reading all that, please enjoy this randomly chosen but AMAZING video!