Okay bloggy peeps (if you combine that it’s “bleeps”-I think that is what I shall call you from now on), I’ve come to a conclusion.
Unless it happens today, I’m not going to fucking ovulate this month. I’m just not. We all have to give up on it and move on. Unless I’ve somehow magically ovulated without there being a temperature change (which I seriously doubt) there is no evidence that it’s going to happen. I’ve been doing research on estrogen dominance and nipple pain and apparently when ovulation fails estrogen takes over and makes your life miserable, which is what’s happening to me now I’m fairly certain.
So here’s what I think the problem is: we’ve all been hoping for ovulation this cycle. And I love you my little bleeps, I love you for hoping for it as much as I have. But I think we have to let it go this cycle. That beautiful 19.36 mm follicle has failed us and we just have to treat it with the same indifference that you treated your 7th grade boyfriend who broke up with you during lunch period. Be indifferent to his face and then die with the pain of a thousand menstruations at home later. The point is, I will NOT let that follicle know that it has gotten to me.
At any rate, my ovaries who I really believe are just misunderstood little sacks of reproduction have really wanted to work for me. I really think they have-and we’ve all been cheering them on! So they’re trying, really hard, which is why this cycle can’t just end. That’s what I think is happening. My ovaries are people pleasers and they don’t want to let me and all my bleeps down-but at this point I think we have to let them know that it’s okay to mess up this time. It’s okay, and we’ll still love them next cycle.
So now, my little bleeps, I need you all to put your collective powers to work on my uterus. I WANT TO BLEED. I just want my uterus to stop clinging to it’s lining with the hopes that it is going to nestle a little bundle of genetic material there. We both have to let that go, so let’s all work together on assuring my uterus that it’s okay to bleed. Really-it is. I won’t be mad at it or ovaries. I know they both gave it an amazing try this time-but we can’t move on and try again if they can’t let go. So bleeps, I need you to thrust your hips in my general direction-I promise to do the same for you-and send some tiny piece of fertility power my way to end this cycle. Let’s do it together bleeps, let’s show that follicle that it is NOT the boss of us this time.