Perfect

Junebug is perfect. Measuring right at 6w2d, heartbeat of 112 (which I thought was low but the internet tells me is just fine for where we are). Everything looks normal. We have been released.

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The only bummer is that we didn’t see our doctor-it was doctor bad bedside manner. But I forced him to talk and answer my questions even though he’s a crank. Hearing that heartbeat is life changing. I am forever changed.

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Yoga Girl Strikes Again

Less than 24 hours till our first “meeting” with Junebug. Also, pretty sure I’m getting a yeast infection and all the yogurt in the world probably won’t be able to stop it. Effing antibiotics.

Moving on.

This story is about a week old, but with all the ear drama last week I totally forgot to tell you guys. So before we went to Atlanta we were trying to really plan out our trip. We did that with Alaska and even knowing what restaurants you’re going to when can really make a difference and save time. We had such a hard time with Atlanta because it’s SO. BIG. I tried to solicit facebook for help, but only got one suggestion. So I called Yoga Girl.

I know, you’re all out there screaming “WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!”, but her husband travels for work constantly (or at least he did, apparently now he works from home) so I knew he’d have an opinion. When I called her she was out to dinner with him. She didn’t answer but texted me saying they were having their last date night before their second baby comes (she’s having a c-section in two weeks) but that she could sneakily text with me if I needed something right then. I responded that it was far from urgent and we could just talk later.

She never called me back which was fine. Whatever. At least I made an effort to continue our very shaky friendship. But then the next day she texted me and said (and I’m quoting here): “I’m convinced you are pregnant and that is what you were calling to tell me. So I hope you are. When r u free to chat…pregnant or not.”

What. the. FUCK.

And I mean, yeah, I am pregnant. But SHE KNOWS WE HAVE INFERTILITY ISSUES. How effing insensitive. What if I wasn’t pregnant, as I haven’t been for every cycle in the last three years. How would that have made me feel?!

I was pretty shocked, so I did tell her and just told her we were really early but that wasn’t what I had been calling about. And we had a nice talk about it all I guess (I never did get my restaurant recommendations), but I was just dumbfounded. For one thing, it’s like the woman has a sixth sense. For another thing, how effing hard would it have been to have just said “Hey, I’m free to chat now-what’s up?”

I will NEVER understand her. And before she had kids we were best friends. I’m telling you, I know becoming a mom is a transformative experience, but it’s not always for the better.

FINALLY feeling better

I can’t hear, but I feel a lot better. Yesterday when I left work (early, at 4:00) I was crying a little. It had started to hurt so bad. I couldn’t sit still. It was awful. Then I sat in awful traffic and by the time I got home I was just drained. Chief put me straight to bed, got me a glass of ice water (my Hello Kitty Tervis, which is my favorite) and turned on Gilmore Girls on Netflix for me. That man knows me, y’all.

Then he made me my requested sick girl dinner of ramen noodles (picante flavor!) and grilled cheese. The last three days of ear pain have led to ZERO appetite, so eating has been a challenge, but I know I need to for Junebug if nothing else. Ramen isn’t nutritious, but it’ll keep you alive in a pinch.

Today I woke up a little ouchy, but Chief put my drops in and I went back to bed for a few hours and feel much much better. Pain very occasionally, but not too bad. I go to my GP in an hour and I’m hoping he can give me some good news. I’m really hoping he can see my eardrum and see how it’s doing, not to mention clean out some of my ear boogers. That’s right, i said ear boogers. The lady at the urgent care didn’t want to do it the other day because she said my ear was too swollen and it would be cruel to me to try and do it right then.

I’m also REALLY hopeful that some modicum of my hearing on the left will be back in time to hear Junebug’s heartbeat on Thursday. Gosh I hope we hear it. 6W2D is a little early, but I really hope it’s there.

Speaking of Junebug, I am officially 6 weeks today. I weighed myself today expecting to have gained a ridiculous amount of weight, because besides the last few days I have eaten WHATEVER I felt like eating since I found out I was pregnant. But I was wrong-I’ve actually lost 2 pounds. I kind of expected to have last some because they weighed me at the urgent care and that number didn’t seem right, but I just blamed it on the scale being different from mine at home. But no. I’ve lost 2 pounds. I’m not complaining. Lord knows I’m going to gain plenty in the next 34ish weeks. I’m just surprised I was able to lose without morning sickness, working out or dieting. This has to be a first for me. Keep burning up all my calories Junebug! We make a great team.

Two more sleeps until ultrasound day. It feels so faaaaaar.

Lifestyles of the Deaf and Pregnant

So, I’m almost 6 weeks pregnant (tomorrow) and I can’t hear and have stuff oozing out of my ear. Not the sort of pregnancy symptoms I envisioned.

However, my pain is….less. It’s not gone by any means, but it’s less. I’ve discovered that the ice pack is my friend. I came to work today. I had sort of planned on not if I was hurting and giving myself one more day to heal, but someone else was sick so I felt like I needed to. I only woke up a few times last night for pain which is a big improvement. I am tired today, and I’m sure I look it, but I feel like I’m on the mend, so that’s positive.

I got an appt with my GP for tomorrow at 3:30 and one with an ENT on Nov 12th. It’s very bothersome that I can’t hear and that my ear fills stuffed with cotton, but I’ll take it over excruciating, mind numbing pain. Right now I just have steady, medium grade pain. The drops have a corticosteroid in them, so I’m hoping that they’re actually working and I’m healing, and that this isn’t just the steroid talking.

The ear pain has been so all consuming that I haven’t really been paying attention to anything else about my body. I couldn’t tell you if my boobs hurt the last couple of days when I took my bra off or not, because the pain in my head has been so. freaking. awful. Which of course makes me worried about Junebug. No bleeding or anything, really no symptoms at all. No morning sickness. Nothing.

Thursday (first ultrasound day) can’t get here soon enough. Come on Junebug. I’m sorry I’ve been distracted these last few days.

Well, so much for that

That amazing relief I was feeling? It was all a sham. The last two days have been horribly painful. Can’t sleep at night from the pain. The drive home today was punctuated by me twisting in my seat and sobbing. I’ve seriously never had such awful pain.

So I went to the urgent care and they said my outer ear is so infected that it’s almost swollen shut. She prescribed ciprodex, and said it was category c. She wants me to do two doses today and one in the morning and talk to my RE about whether or not to continue. I’m so frightened of what this could do to our Junebug, but she said if I don’t get this taken care of my ear is going to close up and they’ll have to “wick” it, which would apparently be bad.

I was so determined to take hardly anything during pregnancy and now I feel like a freaking pharmacy.

I can’t hear but….

I’m also in NO pain, and that is glorious.

But seriously I can’t hear. Just on the bad side, but it makes everything muffled.

Also, I just had my first strong craving. Fried chicken and fresh basil calzone. The waitress looked at me cross-eyed.

Thank you all for being so supportive. Last night was traumatic to say the least, but it could have been so much worse if the emergency room staff hadn’t been so wonderful, especially when I continually told them I was pregnant and didn’t want to do or take anything that would hurt our tiny lentil sized baby. I never want to have anyone reach into my ear with tweezers again, but if I do I’m driving back to Atlanta to have it done.