Tonight I let my kid cry herself to sleep.
Look, CIO is not for me. I actually don’t think that it’s cruel or damaging when done correctly-at least not for the baby. But it’s definitely damaging to me, so I’ve never had the stomach for it.
Charlie is so dadgum unpredictable when it comes to bedtime. Some nights she is the easiest dang baby. Like last night-she nursed after bath, we read a Dr. Seuss book and she started to doze off, so I walked into our room where I put her down in her PNP awake and she IMMEDIATELY closed her eyes and went to sleep.
Then tonight we had her bath, a nurse and a story. Then I even nursed her some more because she started rooting around again. Then I laid her down and she didn’t really do anything at first, but then it was fuss fuss fuss. Then crying. So I picked her up. I tried nursing her. No dice. I tried reading to her. Fuss fuss fuss. I tried rocking with her. Fuss fuss fuss.
So finally I took her back to her room and laid her down. After a minute or two she started to cry. I came out to the living room with Chief and said that I was only going to let her cry for a few minutes just to see if she would go to sleep. She cried for less than three minutes and was out.
Honestly, I don’t believe we “cried it out.” I wasn’t going to let her to continue to cry. In fact I was up and on my way to the room, and when I got there she had fallen asleep. However, if two and a half minutes of crying is “crying it out” and it helps my kiddo sleep, then I’ll say we cried it out tonight.
I feel a little bad, but I feel like I should feel worse. But I don’t, because she’s sleeping. She needs to sleep, and after a day of having no help with her (Chief has the stomach virus-a full four days after I got over mine, which freeeaaaks me out that it lived in the house that long) I neeeed to decompress a little.
I just sat here for a full five minutes thinking about not publishing this because I’m not sure I can handle the comments I might get. Not from my good friends on here, but from the randos out there on the internet who are going to tell me that I’m ignoring the “biological urge” to comfort my child by letting her cry for a few minutes. I didn’t ignore it. I got up to comfort her, but she figured it out herself.
And I’m dang proud of her for it.