I will never talk about success again

That last post I did? The one where I talked lovingly about how much progress my kid as made on sleeping?

Never. Again.

The last few days have been sheer hell. Out of nowhere. She won’t take a nap unless she’s being held, and that has now morphed into her night time sleep. Today she screamed at me for an HOUR for trying to get her to sleep for a nap. I finally just gave up and brought her back out to the living room with me where she eventually and reluctantly fell asleep. This afternoon she fell asleep with my boob in her mouth for about 40 minutes before chief came home, making as much noise as was humanly possible, and woke her up. Then another twenty minutes in his arms around 4:00.

So tonight at 7:20 when she fell asleep nursing, released my boob and went into her bed reasonable I thought the worst was over and it had just been a passing phase. Wrong. So wrong.

Thirty minutes later she was awake and SCREAMING. So I went back there and for thirty minutes I tried just patting her chest, shushing her, singing to her. I KNEW she wasn’t hungry because she had just eaten thirty minutes earlier, and for that matter about thirty minutes before that. So I was reticent to pick her up when I knew she was tired. She kept nodding off and then waking up screaming. Obviously tired. Eventually I caved and picked her up, which lead to her promptly arching her back to get away from me for twenty minutes while I rocked and shushed. By the time Chief got home I was a shaken mess. This had been going on for about an hour at this point. He asked me if I was okay and I started to sob right along with her, so he took her and I went into the nursery and cried.

I tried to nurse her after I got myself under control just for kicks, and she didn’t want anything. The only comfort I drew from this is that my one instinct was right-she wasn’t hungry and I hadn’t made her scream for an hour for food. Always a slight niggling fear. Finally Chief took her back and got her to fall asleep in his arms. He put her down six times before he was able to put her down without screaming starting up again.

So, people, what the fuck? What the ever loving fuck? I just don’t understand what happened. I know it could be a myriad of things. She’s not in a leap (and I try not to pay too much credence to that anyway because it seems like they’re ALWAYS in a leap and if your kid has a problem when they’re not in a leap, well, then you should know that the schedule is not set in stone so probably they’re in a leap. It just seems like a way to make money off of the fact that parents are desperate for an explanation when their kids are struggling. But that’s just my two cents), she is teething up top but that hasn’t seemed to be bothering her these last few days, she’s not sick. She seems perfectly happy during the day.

What we think we’re going to try is putting her to bed in her room. Her pack n play is starting to seem small for her, so maybe she wants some more space. We’re also thinking about going back to a swaddle for a while to get her over this hump. We’ve done it in the past and it’s helped, but an almost eight year old seems so old to swaddle, even if she is only 15.5 pounds.

So that’s where we are. I’ll probably never tell you when it gets better because you see where that got me last time. I’ll just keep it to myself. Please assume that things are terrible at my house, because then maybe it’ll go the other way.


15 thoughts on “I will never talk about success again

  1. It does get better! Two months ago, I would not have had the guts to say that. But now, we are peacefully sleeping through the night. It took 2 years but it happened. And I didn’t do a thing. CIO didn’t work, the patting, the rocking, the falling asleep with the boob, nothing worked for us. She did this on her own. And the timing works because we can’t afford me staying home anymore, I go back to work the 15th..
    You are doing great, just keep reminding yourself!

      • I’m honestly not doing well. The day after I interviewed they offered me the job. I cried all afternoon, my husband was bewildered. The next day I was angry and crying. Now, I’m just sad. I have this awful feeling in my chest and my stomach hurts. At least I don’t have to deal with a daycare center. Friends of ours just moved closer (our husbands work together) and she’s going to keep Peyton. Today was a trial run while I went in for paperwork and she did great. I’m not sure she missed me until she saw me and immediately needed boob. I imagine that chapter will be over soon too.

  2. Oh hon, you poor thing. For some babies (and mine was one of them) sleep seems to be such a tricky concept. I would suggest you keep at what you were doing for a few days to see how that goes. Sorry if that sounds tortuous to you but more because it can take the baby a little while to figure out what the habit is and then once they do they can decide they want to try and break it and voila you get nights like last night. Sometimes they also just have off days so all of a sudden it just goes back to normal and everything is fine. I always felt like it was one step forward and two steps back with all our sleep stuff. It was hard work and even after we had a massive improvement at 6 months we still had periods of regression. Oh and babies make liars out of their mother’s constantly. As soon as you say “my baby does this” they stop doing it and as soon as you say “my baby never does that” they do it. It’s almost like they can hear you make the declaration!! So I don’t have any specific advice except to just keep at it if you can and see if the super grumpy phase passes. I’d be cautious about swaddling now that she is older – I think they advise to stop once they can roll. Definitely do some research on that one first. Good luck! I am praying for a good sleeper this time but with the amount of movement I feel right now I’m not liking my chances! lol

  3. Swaddle, white noise, baby wear. You do what you need to do to make it through this rough patch. I’m so sorry. You’re going through this right now. I’ve been there, and by the end of the day you’re just done. Enjoy a glass of wine or bubble bath after you’ve passed her off to hubby for an hour. Just something to destress and unwind. Sometimes calvins screams ate like nails on a chalk board and my nerves are fried. Dont forget to take care of yourself. Also, ita a super sleep prop, but what about a car nap? Desperate times call for desperate measures. Get a good podcast and just go drive for nap time.

  4. Have you heard of the Baby Merlin’s Magical Sleepsuit? This helped with my daughter Julia immeasurably around this age. It’s pricey, I won’t lie, but for us it was totally worth it.

  5. Babies be crazy. What works one night doesn’t work the next or may never work again. Chick had a rough night on Sunday and I couldn’t figure out why. After waking up almost every hour, I hauled him into bed with us– something I swore I’d never do. Next night? Slept like a… well, a baby in his own crib for 10 hours.

    Be mad, cry, do whatever. As much as this sucks, just remember that this can’t actually last forever.

  6. This happens to me too. I was just telling my dad a few days ago that my son basically is a pretty happy guy and only cries when he is tired. Ever since, the baby has been really crabby (teething I think). Sigh… cannot win. It’s happened to me before regarding sleep too.
    I have heard of something called an extinction burst? It’s basically a reversion to previous reactions a few days after a pleasurable habit has been changed. Apparently it is really common when changing sleep habits in babies. So baby doing great, then suddenly it seems like it is back to square one. The lady at Precious Little Sleep says it lasts a day or two. She says persist with the plan you were using to get to that point!
    These are tough days. They WILL end!

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