Reassessing the Situation

Moving with a toddler is hard. Moving without getting someone to help you with the toddler is maybe not impossible, but probably harder than it should be.

Here was the original moving plan:

1. Move gradually over several weeks, try to take a load over every MWF and both weekend days for several weeks.

2. Use my dad’s truck and my step-parent’s trailer to avoid the cost of a moving truck because momma’s got two mortgages and a few home improvement bills from getting the new house ready to go.

3. Be totally relaxed and calm while doing all of this.

So that list seems fairly reasonable, but in all things, expect changes and unexpected twists. Here’s the new, edited list:

1. Move gradually over several weeks, try to take a load over every MWF and both weekend days for several weeks.  What the fuck were we thinking. Seriously? Did we forget about the toddler who still takes two naps a day? (At first I thought this was a good thing because YAY MOMMA TIME, but now that I need her to be a reasonably happy and well rested human being who can go with the flow of this move IT. IS. THE. WORST.) Not to mention that between taking loads over I don’t have any time to get a decent load packed, so I feel like we’re just throwing shit in boxes and throwing it in the tiny trailer that for some reason is still taking us an hour to load. More about that below.

2. Use my dad’s truck and my step-parent’s trailer to avoid the cost of a moving truck because momma’s got two mortgages and a few home improvement bills from getting the new house ready to go.  Guys, this is not one of my better strategies. It’s like I thought I was back in college and had a 500 sq ft house to move as opposed to a 2000 sq ft house with a huge garden and two out buildings and a giant garage room full of tools. Seriously what was I thinking? We’ve gotten some stuff over there but we’re going to have to bite the bullet and rent a truck. It’s just not going to happen any other way. I HATE spending money on stuff like that but I think my sanity is going to demand it.

3. Be totally relaxed and calm while doing all of this. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I’m sooooooo funny sometimes. Seriously. Hilarious. Every time (this has happened, like once, btw, because of the foot injury of doom) we’re loading the truck/trailer with a baby on my back who is screaming and crying because she HATES moving I want to die a little OR throw myself on the ground and cry OR hide under the covers and just let someone else do this for me. I actually thought about getting a quote for movers but I just don’t need to spend that kind of money. It doesn’t help that I am SO OUT OF SHAPE so moving all of this stuff upstairs, not to mention in the heat of the summer (it’s still very much summer here. Heat index close to 100 today I think. Crazy high humidity) makes me feel even worse about myself than I’ve been feeling. BTW WHY did I buy a two story house?

So yeah, my list has been blown to hell. Here’s what’s good though:

1. My aunts have been helping me so much with painting at the new house. Seriously it wouldn’t get done without them. They’ve been over there a couple days a week painting the rooms that need painting, and my mom and stepdad are going over this weekend to do the wallpaper in the dining room and help do the fence since Chief hurt his foot and hasn’t been able to get back to it. He’s doing much better, but there is no doubt that the injury has really slowed us down big time. So the plan is that my mom is going to start doing wallpaper stuff while he’s in the back yard working on the fence. Chief has DRILL THIS WEEKEND which is the worst timing, but what can you do?

2. The good thing about Chief hurting his foot, if anything good has come from it, is that it forced me to let someone else be responsible for Charlie, and even though it was just for a few hours the fact that it went SO WELL has really helped melt the ice for me on asking for help. The PROBLEM is that folks are busy, and the time that I need the most help is when folks are at work. I think though that next weekend I’m going to ask my cousin if she’ll come to the old house and just sit with Charlie so she can play in a familiar place with someone to interact with while we’re doing the bulk of the move. She’s actually who watched Charlie when I first went back to work at the law firm, so I trust her, and if she’s not available I have a few alternative folks I can ask who I know will help.

3. I’m trying to accept that it’s very possible that everything will not be out by next weekend, but that the stuff we really need will be. I’m letting myself be okay with the fact that I may still have thirty roses to dig up out of the yard and that that’s okay-we can do them the week after we move. I just really want to get the estate sale done so we can get the house back on the market and, inevitably it seems, get it rented so I can stop having two mortgages (even though the second one doesn’t kick in until November). I’m trying to accept that my house is going to look like a disaster for A WHILE because I’M MOVING. It’s hard because it’s been so clean for so long with it being on the market, that I actually have anxiety about the messiness.

4. Tomorrow I am GETTING. MY. HAIR. DONE. I have rescheduled this appointment three times because of all this house shit and while I probably don’t need to spend three valuable and precious hours at the salon tomorrow, I’m not moving it again. I think my hairdresser might fire me if I did, and I just really need something to help me feel better right now. And that’s my head in a shampoo bowl getting a scalp massage and getting all of this fried hair cut off. it’s been something like four months now, which is longer than I ever go-I’m an every six-to-eight weeks kind of girl.

5. We’re splurging on a new couch for the new house with all the money we’re saving on NOT using movers because we hate our current one. It’s perfectly fine looking but it’s very, very uncomfortable, so it’s staying at the old house for the estate sale, and if no one buys it it can stay for staging while I try to sell it by other means (B/S/T pages and craigslist). We’re hoping to shop for one tomorrow after my mini-interview with the pet sitting agency.

6. Chief has tomorrow off completely because there’s no night flying so I get a baby bedtime break.

That’s where we are right now. We’re going to survive this. Maybe just barely, but we will.



5 thoughts on “Reassessing the Situation

  1. Thank you for reminding me to count my blessings right now. I am not moving houses with a baby, injured partner, by myself in a truck in high humidity and heat. What is messing in my life will ease up or I will be back to the doctor. You will discover at some point that you ARE moved and it is behind you…… and the next problem will be showing up on your doorstep. Thank you for posting and sharing the realities beyond the wonder of your daughter!

  2. I am right there with you. We moved labor day weekend. We moved 3 storage units & our house plus finishing my mom’s move with no help. None. Peyton is 2 1/2 and it was brutal. The only good part was that she was totally fine with the new house, slept perfectly fine in her new room right away. We’re still in boxes but at least our old house is finally on the market.
    Good luck!

  3. We also just did this. Moving from an apartment and a storage unit, with a 2yo, while I’m pregnant and useless. We ended up renting a truck twice, since we just could not logistically get everything from both places out and in in 1 day. We had help, but we had to pay them. Except my dad. Ha! The whole new house has to be painted, which is falling on my husband 100%. It’s been hard for me to do so little. But, I’m trying to become good at directing. So, we still have many boxes to get thru, unpack, and pictures and curtains to hang after the painting. Then, baby stuff to sort through.
    Oliver has handled this move like a champ. Truly. Then again, this is his 4th home in his short 27 months of life. I’m sure Charlie will do well.
    I too have been putting off my hair appointment. Since May! Gross. Until today!!! So exciting. I hope you enjoy that time for yourself!
    All of this will come together just perfectly. Eventually. 😀

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