ALL the cookies

Is what I’ve eaten today. I’m honestly not that upset about it, because despite my crazy bad holiday eating habits I’m still losing weight. SHHHHH! Don’t let my body find out it’s doing it wrong! This cookie diet is working!

Ahem.

In all seriousness, I have been letting myself splurge a little bit more these last few days, but that’s because unlike on Monday, my overall eating has been healthy. I’m still eating a healthy lunch of fat free yogurt, a sandwich of PB2 and jam, no sugar added applesauce, an orange. I’m just tossing a few cookies into the mix here or there.

Cookies are good, but the last few days have been rough. Monday night I talked to my mom on the phone for a while and she’s really struggling. She got laid off the same week that I got promoted a few months ago (talk about bad timing) and it’s really got her down right now. She loves Christmas and she’s bummed that they’re so broke and she can’t find a job. I was barely able to get off the phone with her without crying, because at one point I said “Mom, I’m just so sad you’re not happy. Christmas is your favorite-I want you to be happy” and I guess she took that as selfishness on my part (and maybe it was) because she got really aggressive and said “Well how would YOU feel if this were you?” Anyway, I got off the phone and started doing the big gulping sobs with my face all screwed up. Chief handled it like a champ, especially since for once it wasn’t him that made it happen.

And I’ve been working my butt off at the law firm (which I LOVE) and then coming to my day job where half of the people are terrible and by the end of the day I’m just spent. Today I was at the law firm from 7:00 am to 11:00 am and I’ve been here at my “real” job since 11:00 am and won’t leave until 8:00 pm (a little less than two hours from now). And the kids at the neighborhood school are in final exams, so once they’re done with testing they all come over and act like maniacs. And someone called in sick today. And I couldn’t find time to take a lunch break (I just scarfed down food and went back to work). And I could go on and on.

But here is an important thing that happened today:

Bum

BUM

BAAAAAH!

(that was dramatic, scary, suspenseful music if you didn’t know)

My arch frenesis (like nemesis and frenemy all rolled into one? It sort of makes sense. Don’t think about it too hard) “friended” me on facebook today.

My arch frenesis and I have gone back and forth for the past 11 years on whether we are friends or enemies. We’ve even dated (were you picturing a girl? Because yeah, it’s a guy) and by dated I mean fooled around here and there. But ultimately he’s a big, self-centered, egomaniacal jackass. And he tends to think he knows everything. Even with all of that, we had managed to be “friendly” to one another for the last few years because we have mutual friends and it’s just easier that way.

And then.

AND THEN:

One of my best guy friends in the whole world (Chief’s too-he was the best man in our wedding) got engaged and picked arch frenesis as the best man and chief as a groomsman. In all of the flurry on facebook (as there is surrounding an engagement) I noticed that arch frenesis had defriended me but NOT chief! And chief and arch frenesis aren’t friends! Not at all! They’ve only met once or twice. So that was a slap in the face-I thought we were playing nice! So at that point I was done. DONE.

But this weekend Chief and Arch Frenesis and the other groomspeeps are taking the groom on a bachelor weekend to New Orleans, which they’ve been planning all year. And all of a sudden arch frenesis decides to friend me again? Ugh. I wanted to say no, but I didn’t for the sake of the groom. I love him like a brother and I’m super protective of him. Also, I don’t want to seem immature even though I totally feel like it. He’s a jerk. I have enough jerks in my life. And I’m just waiting for him to say something to me at the wedding about when we’ll be pregnant, because that’s the kind of thing he does. He started talking to me about when I was going to get “knocked up” as soon as we were married. If we were in any setting but my best friends wedding I would really dress him down for saying something, but I know I’ll have to behave.

Being a grown up is hard.

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Everything that’s ever happened happened in the past two weeks

That might be a slight exaggeration, but perhaps not.

So as you guys know, I got the assistant manager gig. HOORAH! Hard work and lots of school really DOES pay off at some point 😀

The transition hasn’t been the easiest. Some people have been resistant. At some point I might type a private post about that. You know how paranoid I am about internet spies. But at the end of the day I’m where I need and genuinely believe I deserve to be, and that’s what I keep telling myself.

Also, I have even more work to do than I did before. I’m not really losing any responsibilities as a programmer, I’m just gaining new responsibilities as a manager. Which is fine, staying busy makes the day go faster after all.

In IF updates, the update is that I have no updates. No Lupron side effects that I can notice. I’ve had some problems sleeping, but I can’t tell if that’s from stress or Lupron. The progesterone has been fine. My boobs have even stopped hurting. And I think my hair looks so much better, so I’ll miss that aspect of it. The bummer is that I get to have the shoot-dye-up-my-vagina test on Monday to see if my tubes have remained unblocked since the surgery. It seems soon since it’s only been two months, but this is what the doctor said to do, and far be it from me to disagree. I’m concerned about insurance paying for it, but they paid for it on my surgery day (I think) so I’m just going with it.

Speaking of my surgery, my anesthesiologist has billed me, my surgeon has billed me. You know who HASN’T billed me? The freaking hospital. And I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to remind them or anything. But it’s really weird. I haven’t even gotten notification from my insurance company that they’ve been billed, but I know they have been because the anesthesiologist only took half the deductible, which would mean if the hospital hadn’t billed I would have had to pay all the surgeon’s fee, and I only had to pay 20%. I’m on an 80/20 plan, which means that the hospital must have billed.

So why haven’t I gotten a bill? I payed a $300 down payment, but that shouldn’t have covered everything after deductible. I think I should owe another $400 or so.

Insurance is SOOO fun.

In fitness news, I’m down 45 pounds. It’s SOOOO slow now. So slow. But at least it’s still moving. I’ve started doing quarter mile sprints on the elliptical. They are HARD. But I think they’ll be worth it. Upping the intensity seems like the logical next step. My muscles are hurting, and last night I had one of those never ending dreams where I’m being chased. I keep thinking the two must be related :-/

I’ll update you guys after the super fun vagina-dye test. At least I’m getting an afternoon off out of the deal….

I GOT IT!

Bleeps-it happened.

I GOT IT.

The promotion has happened. I am now the assistant manager of my department 😀

 

AND I busted my weight loss plateau! Two pounds down this week. Who knew that eating more would make such a difference (who besides all the doctors and things who, you know, know these things)

 

Monday is the best! More later!

The Nervous Belly

So, without getting into too many details (because I’m convinced the internet is FILLED with spies), I have a nervous belly.

No, it’s not a pregnant nervous belly.

It’s a belly that is nervous because there is an opportunity in my workplace that I’m in the running for, and it would be a really good opportunity. A large and in charge opportunity. The kind of opportunity that if I don’t end up getting it, it’ll be time to look for other employment. I promise to be less vague in the future.

Anyway, my interview for the aforementioned opportunity is tomorrow. I know of at least one person who is having theirs RIGHT NOW. And this person has already beaten me out of one opportunity, so I’m nervous y’all. So at 11:00 am tomorrow (central time-do your adjustment as you will) please thrust your pelvis’ in my direction and send me all the good infertile lady blogger vibes. I NEED YOU.

In other news, I’ve had my first period since before the surgery. It wasn’t great, but it could have been worse. I had to take most of Thursday off for terrible cramps, but I took my first percocet since the day of the surgery on Thursday and I forgot how happy it makes me feel. I laid in my bed with my heating pad watching Big Bang Theory reruns and felt good about life. Then Chief drove me to work the next day so I could take the happy pills (because they make me dizzy-no driving for this girl on Percocet) and I was the nicest librarian in all the world. If I didn’t think they made me act stoned I would take one tomorrow at 10:45 am….

Anyway, the bleeding is tapering off and now allegedly I’m heading into the belly of the lupron beast. So far nothing too bad, but I’m withholding judgement for now.

Also, I started doing some strength training! And I ate more this week, because allegedly I could be not eating enough. You only have to tell me to eat more once, and I’ll do it. I’m still moderating carefully, but I allowed a few more splurges than I normally would. So I’m doing three 10 minute ab videos a week right now and three nights of arm workout thingies (yes, that is the technical terminology, thank you for asking). Kathy Smith does the ab workouts and she is a cruel taskmaster. I was pleased that I was able to do most of it, although I have to knock down the intensity on the planks. Hopefully that’ll change soon. I’m just 25 pounds from my goal. I’m now to the point of having far less to lose than I’ve already lost, and that feels really rewarding.

Too bad the last 25 won’t come off as easily as the first 25 did…

Think of me tomorrow Infertile Blogging Ladies. INFERTILES OF THE WORLD UNITE!